adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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