Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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