Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
