we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Randomize
