"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize
