I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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