I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
i think im in europe. pls send help
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
