My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize