I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Randomize
