Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
He told me they were just razor bumps!
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
