My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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