id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
