So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
you didnt know i had herpes?
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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