Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Randomize
