WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
