North Korea, Best Korea!
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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