i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
Randomize
