I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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