After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
