we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Randomize
