is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize