Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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