So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Randomize
