have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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