I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Randomize
