It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Randomize
