YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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