It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
