everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
