Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
