Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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