You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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