Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Randomize
