it wasn't lemon gatorade
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
Randomize
