Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
