Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
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