I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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