i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Randomize
