You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Randomize
