Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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