I'm jealous of your bromance
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
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