is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Randomize
