yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
His hands were made for my vagina.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
Randomize
