I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
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