just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize