Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Randomize
