You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
