Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
i need an iv and a liver transplant
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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