I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
You left your phone here
Wait...
Randomize
