I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
did i walk over a car last night?
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
Randomize
