i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Randomize
