If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Randomize
