I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
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